I am honestly not sure where to begin this post. There is so much flooding through my mind right now that I'm actually at a loss of where to start.
I guess let's back up to April 20, 1999. I was 12 years old in the 7th grade and home from school sick with the stomach bug. Laying in bed watching TV trying to go back to sleep. It didn't work. The show that I was watching had been interrupted by a "Special Report: Breaking News." While normally I would have changed it, I was sick and didn't care to get out of bed to get the remote, so I watched. I watched in horror as I seen teenagers about my brother & sisters age running from a school building crying, people injured being pulled out of windows, and the news reporters completely lost on what to say or how to explain what had just happened. This incident became known to many of us simply as "Columbine." 15 people died, and 1 injured (including the shooters). May the innocent rest in peace knowing their memory lives on.
That day I realized just how short life can truly be, you never know when that psychotic break might happen and you never know who it might be that has it. I cried that day, for the kids, for the families and friends who were losing their lives or lost a loved one. At 12 years old I was capable enough to understand sympathy and be able to put myself into others shoes. It was not a comfortable feeling.
Since that day I have been that way. About almost everything. If it's something that someone is traumatized by or something that I can place myself in that position I get upset and generally cry.
A celebrity dies that I grew up watching or idolized and I cry. Characters in a movie or a TV show die that I have gotten to "know" or like- I cry. My husband & friends frequently pick on me for crying over what seems to them to be "nothing" to them.
Until yesterday... Unless you live under a rock you are aware of what happened in Aurora, Colorado yesterday. Just a short 40 minutes from Columbine High School. James Holmes opened fire on an unsuspecting crowd of movie goers at the midnight showing of "The Dark Knight Rises" (the new Batman movie). 12 people have been killed (thus far) and another 39 injured (thus far). What broke my heart initially was the ages of the children injured and dead- 6 year old boy dead (that's the same age as my Princess) and a 3 month old baby injured (at last I heard anyway). UNFORTUNATELY, this psychopath was not one of the few that do us all a favor and kill himself for us. No, instead he sat in the parking lot and waited to be arrested- seriously! He gave himself up without a fight and is currently in police custody. However, I kept saying "thus far" because this idiot booby-trapped his apartment and at this current moment the police are trying to disarm this contraption. So far they have successfully eliminated a few barriers. Best wishes to them, I am praying for the police, firemen and bomb squads that are working on that. But above all, I am praying and my heart goes out to those friends and family that lost loved ones early Friday morning. Also to those who were injured and will forever be marked a victim.
I have cried, I have shed tears for those that I don't know, nor will I ever know. But the tears have passed- for now. I am confused- I am baffled- and I am getting flat out irritated. I don't understand HOW someone could do this to a fellow human being. I was angry after September 11, 2001 for the same reasons. Despite what your religion is, despite who you worship, despite what you believe- we are ALL human beings, none better than the others. We all have flesh and blood, we all have hearts and we can all love. I'm probably never going to understand why people do the things that they do but I can hope that one day all of this senselessness will come to an end and we will all be "one."
Please take a moment of silence to honor those that have passed on- God Bless!
Candle Light Vigil for those lost in Aurora, CO
Those lost at Columbine High School in 1999
Students at a make shift memorial after the Columbine shootings.
Have "COmpassion" for COlorado! <3
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